It happened again. You made a new milspo bestie and it’s time for them to PCS. Usually this happens right about the time you get comfortable and become good friends. Ugh. Sure, you knew it was coming. You hoped it might change, but still the orders came through. Being prepared, however, doesn’t mean it’s an event that becomes any easier. After all, as a milspo, having friends move is an unpleasant life event that you’ll have to live through over and over again.
It might become expected, but that doesn’t mean it gets easier. The good news is that you aren’t alone. There isn’t a milspouse in existence that doesn’t know what it’s like to have a BFF move away.
And that’s exactly why you shouldn’t throw away good friendships. We all know finding your peeps doesn’t happen every day in the military lifestyle, and when you find those whom you love and trust, you should hold on for the long haul.
Stay in touch, even when moving from duty station to duty station, you can remain close to those who live far away. Besides, the military is a small place. You never know if or when you might be stationed in the same location once again!
Talk on the Regular
You have those friendships where you can pick up right where you left off. No matter how long it’s been, you can jump in and talk like no time at all has passed. This is the goal. We’re all busy, and these seemingly effortless friendships can allow you to remain close, even when you can’t talk every day.
“Regular” will mean a different time interval for everyone, but so long as you check in here and there, you can remain close in years to come.
You should also interact in a way that works for your lifestyle. Not everyone has time to dedicate to talking on the phone. Message via texts or apps, exchange video messages that can be viewed at a later date, or you can even go old school and mail letters.
Interact on Social Media
Technology brings us all together via social media. Stay Facebook friends, follow one another’s images via Instagram or Snapchat or however you choose to stay in touch. This will help you to feel connected with one another, even when you can’t talk regularly.
If you’re a private person and limit what you share online, you can opt to share photos with a few close friends in order to keep the most special people in your life tuned in.
Reach Out at Appropriate Times
If you’re moving to a duty station wherein an old friend has lived, if you’re considering buying a car like they had … whenever you could use their advice, ask! At times it feels awkward when we haven’t talked to someone in so long, yet these are the perfect excuses to catch up!
Jump right in, see how they’re doing and ask your question(s). Chances are you will rekindle a friendship and catch up, all while getting some information that you need. It’s a great way to reach out to those in your metaphorical rolodex and to touch base, even if you haven’t talked regularly in years.
PCSing isn’t the ending of a friendship. It’s a chance to keep talking, just from a distance. Consider these communication tactics to remain close with all of your milspouse friends for years to come, no matter how many bases you call home.